temporary amnesia

forgive my temporary amnesia
but i can't seem to remember
when i gave you permission
to tell me who i couldn't be

i didn't give you permission
to tell me when i should be afraid or alone
to tell me when i should be a woman or child
to tell me when i should stay within my lines

but time, age, and the ticking of biology
gave you an excuse to whisper the doubt
promise upon promise you crept in the dark
and too tired to fight anymore i gave in

the sweet poison from your tongue
that promised me life
now tastes rancid and stings like death

age, betrayal, and exhaustion
got more air time than the Holy within
and i gave up my freedom
for manufactured liberation

i lost myself in the journey
but i swear
i have gone out to find her