oxymoronic organic outrage
trader joe's gets an award for being the only thing (other than my general despair) that i've blogged about twice in a six month time span...
when i think "trader joe's", i think "organic". and when i think "organic", i think of such things as kindness, love, a general sense of well-being, janis joplin, patience, an appreciation for the earth and the humans who inhabit it, gentleness, songs like "dust in the wind", self-control, and other positive life-reinforcing things.
however, none of these things apply to the parking lot situation at the trader joe's in st louis park.
you would think that the kind of people who shop at trader joe's ("organic") would be generally happy people. people who care just enough to bypass the big-box stores like rainbow and cub, and the cake-eating stores like byerly's and lund's. people who enjoy the earth, humanity, and the virtues that make this a better planet and us a better people. so i don't understand.
i don't understand why, when waiting in line to enter the traffic jam known as the trader joe's parking lot, i am honked at and bumper-kissed. i don't understand why SUV's try to park in 'compact cars only' parking spaces. and i don't understand why, when i willingly relinquish my right to park in the lot and park three blocks away, i am then almost run over (yes, a pedestrian) by two different vehicles, who apparently didn't have enough other-than-self awareness to realize that there were other people in the parking lot besides themselves.
all it would take to make that parking lot work would be a pair of ears unstopped, a pair of eyes opened, and a smidge of patience. that's it my friends, that's it.
but fear not my fellow st louis park trader joe's patrons. that peaceful organic feeling you expect upon your arrival still awaits you... in the store. so let's hope these angry organic shoppers can keep their anger in its rightly ordered place: their car. because what the world needs now is more angry drivers who drink RsBT-free milk and grain-fed beef.
but i am in the safety of my anger-free home now, and there are at least three things i can smile about: the honeydogs' new album amygdala spins in the background (you must buy this album), percy sleeps soundly by my side, and there is a really good glass of red wine next to my left hand. i shall dwell no longer on the oxymoron of organic angry people.
when i think "trader joe's", i think "organic". and when i think "organic", i think of such things as kindness, love, a general sense of well-being, janis joplin, patience, an appreciation for the earth and the humans who inhabit it, gentleness, songs like "dust in the wind", self-control, and other positive life-reinforcing things.
however, none of these things apply to the parking lot situation at the trader joe's in st louis park.
you would think that the kind of people who shop at trader joe's ("organic") would be generally happy people. people who care just enough to bypass the big-box stores like rainbow and cub, and the cake-eating stores like byerly's and lund's. people who enjoy the earth, humanity, and the virtues that make this a better planet and us a better people. so i don't understand.
i don't understand why, when waiting in line to enter the traffic jam known as the trader joe's parking lot, i am honked at and bumper-kissed. i don't understand why SUV's try to park in 'compact cars only' parking spaces. and i don't understand why, when i willingly relinquish my right to park in the lot and park three blocks away, i am then almost run over (yes, a pedestrian) by two different vehicles, who apparently didn't have enough other-than-self awareness to realize that there were other people in the parking lot besides themselves.
all it would take to make that parking lot work would be a pair of ears unstopped, a pair of eyes opened, and a smidge of patience. that's it my friends, that's it.
but fear not my fellow st louis park trader joe's patrons. that peaceful organic feeling you expect upon your arrival still awaits you... in the store. so let's hope these angry organic shoppers can keep their anger in its rightly ordered place: their car. because what the world needs now is more angry drivers who drink RsBT-free milk and grain-fed beef.
but i am in the safety of my anger-free home now, and there are at least three things i can smile about: the honeydogs' new album amygdala spins in the background (you must buy this album), percy sleeps soundly by my side, and there is a really good glass of red wine next to my left hand. i shall dwell no longer on the oxymoron of organic angry people.
1 Comments:
You're hilarious. Ah yes, my own little Anne Lamott. :)
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