falling through the sand

i've stood on this rock for so long. and it has turned out to be nothing more than compressed sand. so i shift my weight with trembling knees and watch the sand crumble beneathe me. i put my hands to the earth and my heart to the ground about who i am becoming and who i've let go of trying to be.

what makes this formation slightly less painful is the people who love me not because they have to (read: family), but because they have chosen to... my beautiful friends, the most glorious creations God ever made. these are the people who see something in me that's worth loving and fighting for. they see in me what i've never been able to see in myself. they convince me that if i believe hard enough, i just might become the kind of person they all think i am.

they remind me that when i love, i love hard. they remind me that when i laugh, i laugh through the wall. they remind me that when we fall through the sand and land on sprained ankles, we get up and fight for each other again. they remind me that together, we are the broken and bruised kingdom of God.