3.05.2005

the scent of Home...

i've heard people say that there's nothing like the smell of their 'home church'... when i hear this, in my mind i see a church out in the country with wood pews and a cemetary littered with stones engraved with the names of the relatives of the people sitting in those wood pews. the scent is something of must and mold, time and history, fried chicken and homemade pies, boyscouts and dusty organ pipes, love and anguish, God and history.

i never really grew up in a church like that. most of the churches that i grew up in were big churches. plenty of history and friend chicken to smell of, but the smallness to get in close enough to whiff the scent of God always seemed lost on me. the building was too big, too crowded, in too much of a hurry.

i was in the sanctuary of my huge church on thursday night. i was laying on my belly on the stage and i was praying. i folded my arms in front of my head and rested my forehead upon them so that the tip of my nose was touching the burgundy carpet. i inhaled. and i couldn't believe what happened. in a moment, i was transported to standing on the spot of barren earth that used to be underneathe this carpet and concrete, and remembering the dreams and hopes of what this church would become. in a moment i was reminded of all of God's promises delivered to my heart and to the hearts of the people i love as we sang and cried and played and smiled in His presence while standing on this carpet. i inhaled peace, music, my fingers praying on ivory... bruce, matt, joel, michelle... the hotness of the lights when they first come on... people moving to the Table to taste a morsel of His grace, people coming closer to find Him somewhere up above this carpet... i inhaled my God, i found my home.

it was faint, and buried deep under the new-carpet smell, but it was the scent of time passing by rapidly and history being made right before my very eyes as i dawdle and complain that i can't seem to find God in all of the chaos. i realized... the scent of God lingers in all of His churches. it really is a shame that we inadvertantly blame Him for making them too big or too crowded or too busy. we are the ones that are too big, too crowded, and too busy to just bury our noses in the deepness of Him.

so breathe deep. find your home and breathe deep. God is there.